Thursday, November 04, 2010

The Green Adventures of the OsShirt

I arrived in Homestead fairly unscathed although, I have to say, it was HOT here. Queenie squealed like a kid when she opened me. What a greeting! The first thing she did was sniff me. I think it was to see how much trouble I caused before arriving to her. I think Queenie is a bit…weird. That became even more evident when she told me where she was taking me. Apparently, she thinks that my life needed some greening up and she thought it was her duty to teach me how to be more eco conscious.

Yep, we went to some hippy freak, earth loving festival. (The Miami Going Green Festival to be exact) Her hub was given the privilege of wearing me and boy did we look awesome although, I didn’t think that we would fit in very well. It was a beautiful day in Miami. Warm, sunny with a picture perfect balmy breeze blowing. Ahhh paradise. As we arrived, I realized that this wasn’t going to be such a weird experience. These earth lovers know how to throw a party.

I was educated about water conservation, recycling and composting. I heard about eco friendly home improvements. I met some fabulous people from the National Park Service who told me how important it was to be aware of my local eco systems and ways that I could enjoy them responsibly. There was music being performed. Earth friendly cleaning demos. I spoke to a couple of guys about wind power and another that wanted to help Queenie convert her new casa over to solar power. And ohhhh the food smelled delicious and most of it was vegetarian because as I was also taught, animal based diets are one of the leading causes of pollution in the world. I could eat vegetables all day if they all smelled like this. Yum.

I even managed to find some of my relatives!

We got to see 100% electronic cars that had been built by local high school students. I also got to get up close and personal with a fully solar powered boat that could take it’s passengers from Miami all the way to Bimini without using one ounce of gas.

Apparently the owner of the boat didn’t like us getting so up close and personal with this magnificent boat. Who knew that we weren’t supposed to board that sucker and enjoy a little fun. It really was a shock that it had to come to this though:

Who said that eco warriors couldn’t have any fun?

My time wasn't all spent getting hippie-fied. I seem to remember some pics with Queenie herself. Remember how I said I thought she was a bit...weird? I'll just leave it at that. Anyhoo, it was time to be packed off and sent on my way. Next destination? A whirlwind of a visit back to Dallas to meet a couple of new friends, and seeing a couple of old ones!

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Cross Country With Chickie!

Shizzle & 13 got me all ready to head to Florida again, though my destination was a bit further south than I'd been previously. I arrived at Chickie's, only to almost immediately be packed away again for a trip to the west coast! Talk about going across the country! Chickie's husband Sweety actually wore me first. Just to be sure I wasn't a weirdo or anything. Personally, I think he wears me pretty well! We stopped and played at Hoover Dam and the Grand Canyon (it was like déjà vu all over again! but different).Of course, we spent time in Las Vegas, too. Chickie and I stood in front of the fountain at the Bellagio for a good long time. I could have spent all night there!

Eventually, our destination was Los Angeles. It was as warm, but less so than Florida (at least, from what I remember from the short time I was actually there this time). Time spent with her friends, along with some drinking and puking and things. Fortunately she didn't drag me along for any of that. We did the sight-seeing thing too. California is nice in that they make sure you know where you are at any given time, as evidenced by this picture!

We eventually made it back to Florida, where she and I got to spend a little time by the pool, then lounging together and saying our farewells. This was a fun visit, and was just a hint of the fun that the rest of the summer was going to offer up! I'm a little bit disappointed I didn't get to have my picture taken with Chi Chi 2.0, though...

Next stop--southern Florida!

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

Shazam! It's Shizzle!

As mentioned in the last post, I had expected to be shipped out to someplace unknown, but 13 Messages and I got a surprise! The lovely redhead Shizzle came by and wanted to have pictures taken with me! This was the first time that she and 13 had really met (that ride in the elevator doesn't count), but the big guy had met her when he visited back in 2005, before my adventures had really started. Knowing that 13 had a bit of a reputation as a good photographer, and that the big guy has had a huge crush on her since forever, the question of picture-taking was sort of moot. Of course it was going to happen!

Right off the bat, you could tell this was going to be a much different picture taking session that I'd been used to up to this point. Rather than wasting time, she started out with the half-nekkid look! I thought it was nice that her undies matched her shoes, though I'm not sure how someone would normally have noticed that sort of thing. She seemed at ease in front of the camera, and 13 took lots of pictures, just to be sure that he got the perfect pictures. She was kind enough to turn over to give us a look at the other side of that first picture!

Of course, all good things must come to an end, and so it did for the evening. It was time for me to be sent off to sunny Florida. Shizzle must have gotten confused or something, because she started taking everything off except for me! Ah, but I didn't mind. The longer I could be with her, the better (little did I know that we'd meet again this summer!). Finally, 13 got her to take me off, and he got me ready for my trip. I hope she brought some other clothes with her!

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Back to Music City

I've been on the shoulders of some famous people's likenesses on this little adventure over the years, including Stevie Ray Vaughan, the Statue of Liberty, and even a neon pink Jesus! But my next stop found me on the shoulders of the King. This could mean only one thing--I was back in Tennessee! However, I wasn't with the ladies from my past. This time it was with a very nice man with a weird name--13Messages.

Undoubtably the thing I noticed right off the bat is that the internetz girls seem to like him. Quite a bit. And that he is wildly in love with his wife. In fact, I think there were more pictures with her than with him! He does love his camera! We didn't really get out around town on this trip, but I know he and the big guy had a surprise for me that would more than make up for that! We had some wine, we had some fun, but nothing prepared me for what was to come! Yes, Tennessee seems to be a great state for fun, and I haven't been disappointed. The year 2010 was shaping up to be a pretty good year. And I hadn't even gotten the surprise yet! Just when I figured I was about to be shipped off to an unknown location, we got a visitor...

Friday, July 02, 2010

Gettin' Sassy In the Land of Toques

One more trip along the southern shores of Canada was in store, as I was headed to the Toronto area. I shortly found myself cuddled within the ample bosom of the girl they call Sassy! I was a little nervous about this visit, as word had it that she was a bit of a wild woman, and that her name fit her perfectly. I soon realized that I had nothing to worry about.

Motherhood has mellowed Sassy to some degree. Not that she's a spinster or anything like that! But after being around kids all day (she's a teacher), and then coming home to a handsome young man that has stolen her heart...well, she's not dancing on the tables quite like she used to. At least in public. Her household is an interesting mix of family stuff with a dash of naughtiness. She and Mr. Sassy leave naughty or crude love notes to each other with the refrigerator letter magnets. It's cute!

Hopefully, I figured I might get into a couple of pictures with her boy, as it seems she takes pictures of him daily (and how can you blame her? he's cute as a bug!). So imagine my surprise when one night, as she was wearing me while working on school papers, she got "comfortable", grabbed a Moosehead, and started working on her blog. Half-nekkid, even! The old Sassy was back! The boy was in bed, Mr. Sassy was watching TV (hockey, probably), so it was just her and me! Ample pictures were taken...many of which would not be appropriate here!
As it got later, she just left her bra with her blog, and she and I retreated to...well, I'd better not say.

And so ended my adventures in 2009. Soon I found myself back in the town where this all started, but with a vastly different group of people. I could tell that 2010 was going to be a good year!

Thursday, June 03, 2010

Visiting the Canadian South

My next stop in my mini-Canadian tour sent me to the most southern region of Canada. Really...who knew that parts of Canada were further south than any of the states in the Pacific Northwest? Anyway, I got to stay for a good while with one of the big guy's oldest blogger buddies, Binsk. She regaled me with stories from the days when you could see all sorts of cute half-nekkid pics of her on the internet, and the other Canadians she got to party with on occasion. It was obvious why the big guy likes her. In spite of spending some quality time with Binsk, we didn't get any photographic proof of that. But that's OK...I've still got the memories!

Next stop--off to meet the Sassy one!

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

O, Canada!

From the boondocks, I was sent away on my very first international trip! Sure, it was just to Canada, but I snuck in without a passport, so it was at least a little exciting, eh! And while I was technically in the Great White North, I found on later inspection that I was actually far further south than Montana!

Anyway, I got to meet the fun lovin' girl known as Cute but Evil (also known as CbE). Oh, my! Two more perfect words couldn't describe her better! Not evil in a world domination way, but evil like you should check for some devil horns every once in awhile! She's got legs that go from here to Edmonton, but it's the lips--oh, the lips!--that caught my attention. And I don't even have lips.

We didn't really get out of the house at all, but that was okay. There was no real need to. Besides, it was cold! And there I was, a nice tropical shirt, with nary a toque to my name! Alas, after awhile, it was time to be sent on. Since I was north of the border, my next couple of stops would stay up there too. Hopefully some Molson would be waiting for me!

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Down in the Boondocks

As mentioned earlier, I'm baaaaccckkk! My third incarnation appeared suddenly in Indianapolis, of all places! The big guy was in town to catch the Elton John/Billy Joel concert with a lovely lady known as M. And for whatever reason, I showed up! Looking a bit different than before, but with bolder sense of style, if I do say so myself!

I didn't actually get to go to the concert, nor the great times they had with NY Diva, Living Diary, and even M's sister! And the cute little waitress at a place called Hooters! I got the impression that he'd met them before, but I'm not sure why I didn't get to meet them. I might have to see if that can change somewhere in the future...

Anyway, I got to spend some quality time with M in Indy. I think she and the big guy were a bit hungover as she took them to the airport in the pre-dawn hours of the morning, but as a wonderful surprise, instead of flying back with him (and presumably ending my travel adventures), she ended up taking me home to the boondocks! I'm not sure if that was planned or not, but I'm glad I got to go! Really, an interesting place, the boondocks. She and I snuck out one afternoon and ended up by the bluffs down by the river for one last chance to be together. Then I knew it was time to go. Through my prior incarnations, you can just tell. M and I said our final goodbyes, and she got me ready to go. I knew I was headed back north, but as I later found out, it wasn't back to the big guy. I was off to the land of toques and beavers!

Monday, May 10, 2010

Déjà Vu All Over Again

OK, I'm not sure why I've been blessed in the manner I have. A few years ago, I was lost by the U.S. Postal Service. No one seems to know where. Not even myself. I thought it was the end of the story. Then surprise! I rose from the ashes and showed up at the big guy's 50th birthday party in Dallas! Looking markedly different, but back in action! Being passed around from town to town

Well, it's apparently happened again. After the brief but enjoyable time with Jinsane, I was delivered to another location in Looeyville. And pictures were taken. But then real life apparently raised its ugly head and things got wonky. And the next thing I know, we're all packed up and moved to Florida! And then the next thing you know, they've moved back to Kentucky! And where did I end up? I'm still in a box in storage in Florida. Out of the sunshine, which for a northern shirt is a good thing, but damn, it sure gets hot in here!

I'm in limbo. Never sure when I might get rescued. IF I'll ever get rescued. But the most amazing thing happened! The big guy must have gotten wind of things and pulled some strings, because I'm baaaaccckkk! Again, looking a bit different than before, but still making the rounds! Look here in the days to come to find out who I've been spending my time with!

Monday, April 05, 2010


I mentioned at the end of my last adventure that I was sent back out once we returned to Texas. Truth be told, I'm not totally sure that I made it back there. But no matter. I was off to the land of mint juleps, horse racing and baseball bats. Louisville, Kentucky! Good thing the big guy wasn't here, as he has a distinctly northern way of pronouncing "Louisville" that would have gotten him laughed out of the city. To pronounce it correctly, one has to almost swallow their tongue. However, since I have no tongue, I was off the hook!

It was here that I was delivered to a delightful redheaded beauty known as Jinsane! The first thing I noticed about her was that her eyes were the most amazing color and were a perfect match with me! And then her tattoos. All of which can be seen in her HNTs that she's graciously grouped together in her sidebar! This is a girl who could probably drink the big guy under the table with little problem. She's completely at home around beer, friends and a pool table. Probably with motorcycles, too! But she's got a wonderful "girlie" side to her, too!

She was little on the sick side when I visited, so we didn't get out much for pictures, and her flash went out on her when I arrived. But we did the best we could (which seems to be pretty fine). I was particularly fond of her use of the mirror! It was a short and sweet visit with her, and to my surprise, a very quick delivery to my next destination! I'd find myself just on the other side of town! But all good things must come to an end. A bizarre twist to my travels, yet, sorta like déjà vu all over again. But that's a story that will have to wait until next time...

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Don't Mess With Texas

My next journey sent me back to Texas. Just can't seem to get away from there. But that's OK. There's some great friends I've made there! And this time, it was back to see No One In Particular again! She had done so much work on the big guy's birthday party the last time I saw her, it's the least I could do to come back. Especially with my new look!

We spent some quality time together. She even gave me a new patch to wear! (Be sure to click 'em to big 'em!) But then something unexpected happened... I found myself being stuffed into a suitcase with a bunch of her clothes and underthings! Didn't mind the underthings that much, but I was confused. Apparently, I was going to take a sidetrip while on my trip! But this looked like some serious travel about to happen. At least she had a change of heart, and took me out of the suitcase and stuffed me into her pink carry-on bag. I might clash with that color, but I'm secure in my sexual identity to not be afraid of being seen in a pink bag (sexual identity??? WTH? I'm a shirt!).

Next thing I know, I've got a window seat on a big plane at the Dallas/Fort Worth airport. Like a good shirt, I read along with the flight attendants as they told us all about the safety features and procedures. Good information to know! Once we got in the air, NOIP and I spent the flight reading about more fun endeavors. The section on hula dancing was near and dear to me, as it brought back memories of my past life... *sigh...*

The rest of the trip is sort of secret, so I can't tell you where we went, but suffice it to say that we partied together like rock stars! That's my story, and I'm stickin' to it! Upon our return to TX, I was promptly bundled up and sent away for the next leg of my adventure. Off to a place where you almost have to swallow your tongue to say the name of the town correctly... More on that the next time!

Monday, March 22, 2010

Back for a Farewell Party!

I was sent away from Florida with all necessary repairs made, and found myself headed back to the same girls that started this whole adventure back at the end of 2005. Though we were all a bit different than we were when we first met. It was a farewell party for one of the girls who was headed overseas for awhile. Most of that old gang was there, and it was good to see some recognizable faces. The farewell girl even celebrated, and allowed me to join her for a new belly button piercing!

Unfortunately, I don't recall much of my time with them, and there just weren't many pictures taken there. I do seem to recall that I was only there for a short time, and then sent away to a new destination. And back to another old friend. Was this the beginning of a loop? Would I not get to meet anyone else new? Only time would tell. In the meantime, I said farewell too, and it was off to Texas!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Time for a Pit Stop

The next stop in my adventure took me back to another friend I had made earlier, back in my prior form. The woman's name was Phain, and you can see my earlier fun with her here. For whatever reason, I didn't leave her name the last time. But it's her!

This time around was just as fun! We got some sun together (as you can see by her back). And even though I'm not posting the pics, the kids and I had a lot of fun too! But Phain, being the motherly type, also took some time out to make some much needed repairs to me. Some of my button holes had gotten ripped due to some rambunctiousness and overly eager participation!

After spending time here, and getting all spiffy again, I was shipped off to the women who sort of started this whole thing. I was just a tad nervous...

Tuesday, March 09, 2010

Where Everyone Knows Your Name

I left the sunny (and very warm) days in the southwest and ended up way over on the east coast. The north-east coast, to be more correct. OK, Boston, if you're going to force me to say it. There, I found myself in the company of the very lovely, and very leggy, Monalicious! There do seem to be an awful lot of long legged ladies out there! Anyway, this particular LLL was not only a looker, but she has smarts, too! While I didn't get to meet any of her friends (which was fine with me), I got the impression that she could make them wherever she went. I spent about a week here, but didn't get to see many of the sights. Just as well. I was getting plenty of sights right here!

The last I heard, she up and moved to the South, and got herself hitched. I don't know if our paths will cross any time soon, but here's to hoping! Continuing on, she sent me back on down the coast to see an old friend...

Wednesday, March 03, 2010

If Something Would Have Happened in Vegas, I Would Have Stayed in Vegas!

Two of the people I met in Dallas (they actually flew there to help celebrate his birthday??) were my next hosts. Tara Tainton was her name, and her lover/roomie is Code. She's a tough cookie to try to figure out. When she and the big guy first met, she seemed fairly shy. But she also greeted him wearing a bath towel, having just stepped out of the shower. As the party weekend continued, that shyness seemed to disappear. What I didn't realize at the time is that she was also a budding porn star! She specialized in homemade porn...not the really fake, tacky stuff. Being rather shy myself, I was terrified that I was going to find myself in one of her videos! Would I look good on camera? Would I get stained by something unmentionable? Would I have to wear a dry-cleaning bag?

Fortunately, she had nothing like that planned for me. Just a few somewhat naughty pictures. :-) And Code got into the action too! Later on, before she sent me on my way, the two of them were joined by her mother, who couldn't resist meeting me either! We took a quick trip over (up?) to the Grand Canyon (click the pic!). I think we look pretty good together up there, don't you? Soon, we parted ways, and I next found myself somewhere where everyone knows your name...

A word of warning...if you go to Tara's site, it's what the kids would call "NSFW"!

Monday, March 01, 2010


I'm not the only one who has had some changes. I went home after the party (well, the whole weekend) with the lovely Stealth. Who used to be Texas Spitfire. She did something to her knee at the party, but it wasn't anything a bottle of tequila couldn't fix!

I understand that she's been away for awhile, but has snuck back into the blogging life, so you should check her out when you can!

As for me, I shortly found myself on my way to Las Vegas! Woohoo! You know what they say about Vegas... (but I'll be sure to share a little bit with you!).